that i am not that i was

i cannot for the life of me
find the peace of mind to fall 
asleep tonight.

because,
every waking moment,
that i am not,
i spend wishing,
that i was,
with you.

and i could pretend
to see things by your eyes
but that would be a lie.
for ive wasted all my time
living out of your eyes.
too close to see through
but never far from view.

when you feel the need of touch
or anything soft. i can be that much.
and lightly flick your tears away
a shameful trip that they ever did stay.

the doubt that holds your heart in check
the slight snag that stings
the back of your neck
the things we speak of
but never say
expressed by means
of a different way.

and remember,
the greatest part of love, is missing that certain someone.